I went back to Bay St. Louis for the last time today. Had nice long visits with close friends; we'll be keeping in touch, but I don't know when we'll be seeing each other again. I'm planning on heading out to the Pacific Northwest U.S. later this week or early next week.
My friend has decorated her FEMA trailer (camper) with Christmas lights. Someone also gave her a string of lights shaped like little RV campers.
I hadn't planned on going to my old house again but found myself driving down my street. The house is totally gutted now, down to the studs. You can stand at the front door and see all the way through to the other side of the house. The Army Corps of Engineers hasn't yet removed the earlier debris piles, so the workers just piled the house parts on top of my possessions. The first thing I saw driving down the street was the yellow insulation from the attic spread out all over the yard. Among the debris is the hot water heater, bathtub, and the central air conditioning/heating unit from inside the house. I looked across the street from my house, and someone had put a piano by the curb to be hauled off.
The sun had already set by the time I left Bay St. Louis. Driving west to Baton Rouge, I was aware that this was the last time I'd be making the trip I've made so many times during the last several years.
One thing I used to do a couple of times a month, as a treat, was order a pizza to be delivered -- pepperoni and black olives. A pizza place has just re-opened in southern Hancock County, so for my farewell meal in Bay St. Louis today, one of my friends picked up a pepperoni and black olive pizza. We ate it sitting in the dining area of her FEMA trailer. Chocolate cherry ice cream for dessert, of course.
FEMA trailer occupied by a woman who stayed for the hurricane a few blocks over from my house and saw the fifteen-foot wall of water coming down the street.
The town seemed different to me today. I saw a lot more FEMA trailers parked in people's driveways and yards.There are still many piles of debris all over town, even more than a couple of weeks ago. It appears to me that people are in the final stage of gutting their buildings and have reached a certain level of acceptance about what has happened. My perception is that the residents have moved out of the "acute crisis" stage and are settling down for the long haul. I hesitate to say they're in recovery mode, because there is still too much uncertainty about too many things. However, at least people are now out of the cold and rainy weather; many had been living either in tents or in what remained of their houses that had been gutted down to two-by-fours.
The strength, resilience, and just plain guts these people have is magnificent, yet I can't help being concerned about them. In many ways, they are still extremely vulnerable. Something very bad happened here, and we will carry this with us for the rest of our lives, no matter where we go or what we do.
Because of the political, economic, and social consequences of this storm, which are still developing, I believe that Katrina's significance goes far beyond its status as the most devastating natural disaster in U.S. history. It may have changed the course of history for the entire world. Out of the billions of people living on earth at this time, a little over 10,000 of us had the privilege and the pain of living at "ground zero", Hancock County on the Mississippi Gulf Coast, which directly took the eastern eyewall.
I asked in my very first post on this blog, "what shall we call ourselves", those of us in the Katrina diaspora? I know now. We are Katrina survivors.
i feel so much sadness...but i do sense some hope in your words - you are moving on to a new place and new adventures
be safe on your upcoming journey ;)
Posted by: marlaine | Monday, November 21, 2005 at 03:29 PM
That's pretty much how I feel, Marlaine. Very sad, and at the same time excited, with a strong feeling of peacefulness underneath. Doors closing, doors opening. For the record, I'll be continuing this blog. The journey ain't nearly over yet. :)
Posted by: Kitty | Monday, November 21, 2005 at 11:13 PM
wow, it's so different when you look at the pictures and read the text as well. You really get a feeling for what it must be like.
"The strength, resilience, and just plain guts these people have is magnificent, yet I can't help being concerned about them. In many ways, they are still extremely vulnerable. Something very bad happened here, and we will carry this with us for the rest of our lives, no matter where we go or what we do."
That's true, but I get the feeling that if you can handle this katrina crisis, then you can handle pretty much anything else in life :)
It sounds like you are really starting to move on, and that's good.
I wonder though Kitty, since going through Katrina, what are the most important life lessons you got from it? I mean, did the Katrina disater make you realize what is truly important in this life?
And defitely keep blogging, I love reading your posts becuase they make me stop for a bit and just think about things more deeply :)
Posted by: alwaysdare | Wednesday, November 23, 2005 at 07:30 PM
alwaysdare, thanks so much for your words -- it's nice to know that I'm connecting with other people with what I'm doing here. That makes me very happy. :)
I hesitated at first to label what happened with the hurricane "very bad", because I realize that is a judgment, and not the only one possible. There is a part of me just observing all of this, not making that judgment. On the other hand, I want to be in reality as much as possible, and at the level of being human in the world we're living in now, it was pretty bad. It feels important to me to honor that.
"That's true, but I get the feeling that if you can handle this katrina crisis, then you can handle pretty much anything else in life :)"
You are right about that!! As far as the other life lessons from Katrina, well ... right now, I'm so full with this experience. So many things I'm seeing ... things I thought I already "knew", that I'm now getting at deeper levels. The lessons are still in progress. I'm curious to see how what I'm learning plays out in my life. I guess that's partly what this blog will be about.
Posted by: Kitty | Saturday, November 26, 2005 at 02:37 PM
Kitty: Yep, it does feel good to be able to connect and relate to what other people are going through and I can definitely pick up on those vibes from your blog :)
Yeah, thinking about the hurricane as "very bad" is as you say a label. And it could be a stupid label too because you can learn so much from these kinds of events. Who knows, in some weird way, this event could actually have saved your life in a way you can not yet imagine :)
Posted by: alwaysdare | Monday, November 28, 2005 at 05:25 AM
Kitty, as always, I am wishing you all the best of happiness and love and good karma and safe travels..I look at the pictures and smile and cry all at the same time. You all are Katrina survivors....along with the 9/11 survivors...I hope that the Universities and higher education institutes study Katrina and we learn from it. It overwhelms me and I don't live there...the survivors are amazing...you are all pillars of strength and optimism....wherever you go, you will carry its memories and spread the word so we don't forget and learn from it.
Hugs and best wishes!
Posted by: Michael | Monday, November 28, 2005 at 11:45 AM